Age Gap?

I recently told my new cgl that i want to be a helper again.



Lots of conviction burn in my heart... I mean i really do not like to lead. I guess you can call me the "serving" type rather than leading type. But i really feel God calling me to walk out from my comfort zone to do his works again.... To feed his lamb, tend his sheep... and feed his sheeps.



I'm so confused today. On my way back... i was really tired. I can't say that i did alot of work ... but maybe because of the lack of exercise ... i grew easily exhausted after all the chair carrying and shifting in Expo. But yea .. on the way back ... i became quite irritated with the gang i was with. My cg mates. It's like i don't belong there at all... The things they say ... the lame joke they crack ... yea they are ok. But I am not particularly keen to participate and talk. Sure in the past i will just go ahead and chat wif them to my very very best. But now it's different. I do want to fellowship.. but a part of me does not want to be with them. I am not a child a kid anymore. The "woos and ahhs" about teenage life doesn't really impress me anymore. I really don't know but i think after coming out of army ... i feel that i need to be more like a man and less like a kid. I mean i like to party and such ... but together with them .. it's almost like a joke.



God what's happening to me? You called me for your work ... yet to me it all seem so wrong... this environment i'm in. I kept thinking that i might need to change cg. But no lord.. i won't decide this based on my feelings or thoughts. Yet God, please show me how to connect with the young lives again. Please also show me if i should continue together with this cg w143. I am in a mess right now but yet Lord i know your ways are higher than mine... so are your thoughts. Holy spirit guide me. Thank you God. Amen.


A short extract from John 21.

When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?" "Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Feed my lambs." 16 Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?" He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep." 17 The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?" Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Feed my sheep. 18 I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go." 19 Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God.