[Adapted from 03s53 1st 3 month's yahoo group]
This is pretty funny. I am going to steal it =D
WIFE's DIARY :
Sunday night - I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to
meet at a cafe to have some coffee. I was shopping with my friends
all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.
On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I love u, too." When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV; he seemed distant and absent.
Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed. I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HUSBAND's DIARY :
Today Manchester United lost the match. DAMN IT..!!
The perils of a decaying marriage.
9 comments:
actually I didn't think that the marriage was decaying, but its like the differences between men's and women's thinking. If the husband had told the wife from the beginning that he's down because of the match, that wouldn't happen. Sadly, men are LIKE THAT, always keeping their thoughts to themselves. -_-;
In general, compared to women, men are much more silent with their thoughts and opinions. When they do voice their thoughts n opinions, its part of the solution, not part of the process of getting the solution. I find it very rare to hear guys talking about what is troubling them and how they feel, just like a closed bottle.
Haa thanks for you comment.
The perils of decaying marriage. Let me explain part by part
[wordweb dictionary]
Perils -> a possibility of incurring loss or misfortune
Decaying marriage -> crumbling marriage.
So simply speaking, a failing marraige has losses/misfortune. Gee that was what i meant. No further meaning.
The root cause can be lack of communication and understanding like ya said. But hey not all the blame belongs to men. [Takes a stand for man :)]
Faulting men that we are more silent and thought and opinions is bad!!! It is true that most men are more quiet and less expressive in their thoughts. That is not a factor to put blame on though. Being very expressive has its cons too. If you watch apprentice, you'll understand that there are some ladies that talk too much but listens too little.
ha i'm not putting blame on the girls. But for a couple to grow and continue on in a relationship, it takes more than just plain communication. Communication is important no doubt. However on top of that, there should be a factor of understanding and passion. A good level of communication can then be establish between the couples. That's how i feel. I am not an expert on this subject so i shall not blabber too much :)
Guess you still remember some of the things written by Allan and Barbara Pease. Why men lie and women cry. That's surely a nice book.
Excuse me I think your wordweb dictionary is not giving you a proper definition. Although I am a young girl, inexperienced and ignorant, I happen to know what does the word "peril" mean. Lets search it up from dictionary.com
peril
1.
1. Imminent danger.
2. Exposure to the risk of harm or loss.
2. Something that endangers or involves risk.
Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.
peril
1 : exposure to the risk of death, destruction, or loss
2 : the cause of a loss (as of property) eg insured their home against fire, floods, and other perils —compare RISK
Source: Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Law, © 1996 Merriam-Webster, Inc.
So, the word "peril" can be substituted for "danger"
"The Perils of a decaying marriage" can therfore be rewritten as "The dangers of a crumbling/failing marriage."
Maybe you got the definition of "peril" wrong.
I do not see why you needed to contest me on the definition of that, because in my previous argument, my topic was about the lack of expressiveness from guys, not about a crumbling marriage.
Quote: It is true that most men are more quiet and less expressive in their thoughts. That is not a factor to put blame on though
Your argument does not stand. "that is not a factor to put blame on though" is a universal excuse. If you were to argue your point that men are more quiet and less expressive in their thoughts, you should say why it is good to have this trait.
And I never did say that overexpressiveness is good either. You have swayed in the wrong direction.
Passion, yes. But without communication, will there be understanding?
No I don't remember much of that book, other than it has really spastic parts and seems more like for entertainment than serious study.
hey i am not contesting you about this. With the words you use, it sounds like i am challenging ya men.
Well for the definition part, i won't say much. Maybe the dictionary i use is inferior to the world's. Nevertheless i am just trying to speak up my mind. That's it. :) No offence. THANKS for correcting me though you can certianly do so in a nicer way.
Sigh girls. evil evil evil.
BTW, you just show one factor i mentioned earlier. And to correct my earlier point:
"If you watch apprentice, you'll understand that there are some ladies that talk too much but listens too little. "
This applies to guys too. But i seem to draw a similar argument here in this discussion. ah well...
I seem to get the impression that this small discussion is turning to a formal debate.
"Your argument does not stand. "that is not a factor to put blame on though" is a universal excuse. If you were to argue your point that men are more quiet and less expressive in their thoughts, you should say why it is good to have this trait."
-__-
Men i am getting stress out. Well its an honour to debate with a grade A2 in GP turtle. Ha i will do my best!!! GAMPADE!!!
Maybe that statement isn't a point itself. Its more like a supporting point to show simply that blaming men isn't an issue here. That's about it. It is a trait for most men to be quiet as far as i know from the books written by the Pease family. And from that i don't think its fair for you to put most of the blame on the guys. Being quiet doesn't mean guys don't relate. There are so many ways to relate with another person, not just by words. Simple actions, gestures can also help in communicating the love messages in a couple. And certainly, guys are not dumb. We just don't speak much. For a true relationship to exist, i believe that there are more than just words through communication. Words are of course the most common and direct way to relate a point. However, it is not the only way of communicaiton.
Research shows that 7% of communication is verbal. 55 % is based on body language. So guys speaking too little isn't the real source of problem. If that's the cae, marriages will be doomed for failure.
"And I never did say that overexpressiveness is good either. You have swayed in the wrong direction."
I am just making a point, not counterarguing any of your points [in case you are wondering]. Maybe i am too lazy to elaborate. That most of the time, listening is more important than speaking. That's it.
"Passion, yes. But without communication, will there be understanding?"
Yes communication is truly the key to understanding. I am sorry i did not elaborate further. I am jsut saying that communication itself may be useless if both parties did not make effort to understand each other. There is clear line between understanding and communicating. You can communicate but not truly understand what the other person is conveying to you. That's all.
Thanks for you comments turtle. :) It makes my blog more lively ^^
Yes you were challenging me!! weirdly you put the definition of perils there(not a very good definition somemore), as if i don't know what does "perils" mean. -_-;;; which was why i *karate chop* back! i advise using dictionary.com or dict.org dictionaries ^^;;
now your points are making more sense, more logical, better thought out~~ yaay :D
show off your intellectual side man ;)
ha
wad should to say.
Men are Angels!! :D
Girls are evil !!! :D
I am really asking for it. ha
stormchaser :
Point noted. Thanks for the comments.
guys are evil! especially polar bear!!
Kcirtap is evil!
lol
i can't agree further. =P
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