Days ago.

This week is a pretty TIRING week!! With all the admin work .. follow-ups and call-ups (to those who actually answered my call) .. and meetins with my leaders.. sometimes it can grow really weary!


But i think it's all's great. I never felt so stretched.. so tired. Balancing my army work life in the day and making sure everything runs well in my cg and ministry by night is building up on my capacity and strength. And this i know very well prepares me for greater works in the future. Things that i know i will not break a sweat after my breakthrough :)


Tiredness aside .. there are some other thing that disturbs me this week that i've shared with 'Dad'. All through the week.. i feel funny around people. Well it's hard to explain this but .. I can't say the things that i wanna say to my friends. My mind goes blank at times when i work ... and .. even at times i get into the habit of mumbling my words out. or tongue-tied. it makes me feel like i'm going mad. there's a strong feelin of inadequacy running in me.


I am wondering if there's any part of me that's still maybe shutdown? Cos' the tendency of me staying away from people is jus unbelievably strong. Its like yesterday for eg.. when the ushers were fellowshipping wif me ... i will just feel like getting away from them. My heart is just not as excited as it used to be when we joke or talk about the hot~ things under the sun. It's weird. Do i have an inner child that is afriad of people? i dunno. I could only think of silly speculations right now :(


I think it's time to get back to be like Mary. It's great to serve God's people and my friends around me. But i feel like i am missin out the one thing that matter the most in my whole walk with my heavenly friend. It's time to spend more time with him.. everyday.



ok! i'm Typing this on my Sunday duty in camp. well will pray along wif u guys in church in my humble own way in camp :) Have fun!


regards :
Happy Bday Pascale! and belated bday to audrey! dun think they read my blog anyway but shall jus wish for fun =D