When the Answer comes.

Its amazing when you walk on. Just amazing..










In case you haven't read my previous entry, i was walking a lonely trail ... right deep in the dark valley. Its a very lonely walk. Its a very sad walk. Its just hard to explain and express..









I've learn in a real powerful way the meaning of walking on. Its exhilarating. When you found the key that unlocks your problem. It just blows you up with love and joy.









What about walking on? I'm sure to all christians, you'll know this poise and cogent verse.







Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil ...
Psalms 23:4












This is the walk i'm talking about. The "Keep-On-Walking principle"










Throughout the week, i am burdened with worries. These thoughts are self-replicating thoughts. Like for example:





You will never live up to "Mom's" expectations. Everyone is moving on. You are just moving too slowly and or not moving at all.





or





Nobody in this damn world will ever understand you. Nobody. They'll just carry on and leave you behind.





or






Nobody ever appreciates you. Look at all you've done. What are this to them? They'll just accept and forget.








or








You are just a chip of an old block. You'll never be the head but always the tail. You will always be the shadow of others.









These are just some. Can you imagine being tortured by this thoughts. Maybe you will. Maybe you never will. That's why i say in my previous entry that i am so drown, i'm suffocating.








It might be just my mind playing tricks on me. Meany me bullying me. I never understand who i am. I am always living to learn myself. That's what i've understand in the recent years.

I ask myself why am i behaving so much like my friends. I take on their personality. Where is my own? I realise that it's because there is never a true mentor in my life. No one to guide me straight from the start. I take on no image.

I feel that kids take on the image of their moms and dads. When i see the kids around me, i know that they have something to take on with them as they grow. Their attitude. Their character. Their love. I simply have none of that.








I cant believe how open i am today. It just all comes back together as i blog, i remember this things of my shady past. I used to be a very minus person. Negative. Problem-centred. I can put up a smile right infront of you but i just can't show the bitterness in me to you.







That's why its hard. That's why i know no one in this world will ever understand the things running in me.






This is my past. But if you don't know, your past can catch up with you some times. Even if you live a new life in Christ. It's just one of the many obstacles you'll face. And for that, you might be too caught up again of the things in the past. You just can't let go.










That's me for ya. That's me this week.











I remembered "mom" said that as you grow from glory to glory, you'll meet new challenges. Janet also told me this before too. That when you have a breakthrough in your christian walk, you'll meet new obstacles. Most of the time, it'll happen almost right away. The devil is not going to let things go so smoothly. I guess it might be applicable here. If you ever hear from a Christian that says - "When you walk with God, you'll never meet another problem ...." He is lying straight at your face. A Christian's walk is never an easy walk. Its a tough one. It sometimes take alot from you. And from there i start worrying.

Am i strong enough to carry on? Is this the path for my life?





And it seems so. Yes it is. Just Keep on walking....






When you feel you are alone in the deep valley, remember to walk on. I've known of people who simply give up during this walk. I must say i did felt like this. Not just once, but many times. You can imagine how much i've been through. But still I walk on. Keep on walking.








For this week, i understand alittle more when i act by faith. I understand alittle of what it is meant by the sacrifice of praise. Even if you don't feel so drown and tired in your life, you can just come before God. And offer him that sacrifice. When you honour him, he'll honour you.










When i know that Pastor Tan is preaching, at the back of my mind ... it's telling me : Oh no its him. I like pastor Kong better. He is more funny and more spiritual as he is our Senior pastor.




What a bias thought aint it?




Then i heard about the sermon .... -> seedtime and harvest <- Automatically the tape im my mind just ran >> men i heard this before. Hope it'll be good.



The thing is ....

I never know his message is the very answer i need. I don't know what those messages mean to you but it means alot to me.


The sermon showed me some keys i've never see or heard before. I was enlighten more and more as he speaks. He talks about creation and about some things we or maybe I have never pondered before.

But the best thing was the verses and message that impacted me. Its like the Rhema word. The word of God that speaks directly to you




1) Gal 6:7 - Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.

Sounds harsh ? Look at the way pastor put it .... A man's harvest in life depends on the seeds he sow.

Again it just hit me. All along the thoughts that i've sowed is pushing me off the cliff. They are doing more harm than i realise. I have to understand that this thoughts doesn't really belong to me. I am not what this thoughts say to me.


2) Gen 1:26-29.

God created men to be restorers. We are given dominion over creation as what the bible says. Since the fall of man when sin entered humanity, we lost our original purpose as restorers. As we walk with God, he restores us. Above that, we need to be fruitful and multiply the seeds he first put in us.

And then it hit me again.

Those seeds i sow in other people's life is not just a blessing to others. Things i have done for others are not going to be forgotten and thrown away. They are going to bear fruit. I have to keep on believing in them When they bloom and blossom, they are not just going to be blessed. They are going to be a blessing to others. From there, you will find the hundred-fold reward.



3) Be seed conscious, not need conscious.

Before that, pastor said that we have to sow our best seeds. Sow generously. Sow in faith.

Every area of our life needs a seed to be sowed.

These words hit me mightily. As you reflect upon your life, you need to examine the aspects that you have to change. Then sow into it. Its going to take a step of trust. That's faith. Its going to take alot of time and effort. That's generosity. Its going to take commitment and wise planning. That's our best seeds. When the seeds bloom into the differnt flowers in your life. You can finally smile and admire the pretty flowers. Then you'll understand the goodness of seedtime and harvest.

4) There's a time for everything.

Don't be dishearted. Don't worry. God will never lead you to a place where his Grace cannot keep you.

.... But God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it
1 cor 10:13

God is our provider. He lets things happen not to pull you down, but to make you ever stronger. A victor's heart is not one that cannot accept challenges. Its one that knows how to overcome it.



And finally a lovely verse at the end that touches my heart and sets me free...











Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy.
Psalms 126:5











I've learn alot. When you keep on walking with God, you'll know it someday.







I pray that we'll will find our right path in life.